HALLWALTZ.COM: Recent Comments

Comment on Electronic Cigarette's

Electronic Cigarette — Fri, 14 May 2010 03:02:02 GMT

Red Dragon looks cool. I may just have to get one after reading this.

Comment on Joke of the day.

Brett — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 23:18:50 GMT

Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
4. A dog's parents never visit.
5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.
7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk..
8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"
10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.
11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.
12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.
13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.
14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.
Ultimate True Test: Lock your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car for an hour. Then open the trunk and see who's the happiest to see you.

OK everybody relax...it's just a joke.

Comment on Joke of the day.

Brett — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 13:21:28 GMT

10 rules for men to have a happy life

1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home.

2. It's important to have a woman who cooks from time to time.

3. It's important to have a woman who keeps the house clean.

4. It's important to have a woman who has a job.

5. It's important to have a woman who likes you.

6. It's important to have a woman who can be your very best
friend.

7. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.

8. It's important to have a woman who you can trust, who doesn't
lie to you.

9. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed.

10. It's very, very important that these nine women do not know
each other

Sincerely,
Tiger Woods

Comment on Links page

UK Software companies — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 14:53:00 GMT

Quite inspiring,
Great links,
Thanks for bringing this up

Comment on Joke of the day.

Brett — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 16:19:42 GMT

Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with
Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.
This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for
shopping at the Husband Store. (scroll and keep reading!)

PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex..

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

Comment on Gripe post

B Donald — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 07:15:35 GMT

I would like to gripe about McDonalds Ice, you know the stuff you buy in the bag to take home.
Not sure why there ice is different but it always seems to freeze into one big block of ice after I get it home.
Under the same conditions ice from anywhere else does not do this.

Comment on Joke of the day.

B Donald — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 23:29:43 GMT

Miss Beatrice,
The church organist,
Was in her eighties
And had never been married. She was
admired for her sweetness
And kindness to all.
One afternoon the pastor
Came to call on her and she showed him
into her quaint sitting room.
She invited him to have a seat while
she prepared tea...
As he sat facing her old Hammond
organ,
The young minister
Noticed a cut glass
bowl Sitting on top of it.
The bowl was filled
With water, and in the
water
Floated, of all things, a
condom!
When she returned
With tea and scones, They began to chat.
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity
About the bowl of water and its
strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer
resist.
'Miss Beatrice', he said,
'I wonder if you would tell me about
this?'
Pointing to the bowl.
'Oh, yes,' she replied, 'Isn't it
wonderful?
I was walking through
The Park a few months ago
And I found this little package on the
ground.
The directions said
To place it on the organ,
Keep it wet and that it would prevent
the spread of disease.. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter.

Comment on Joke of the day.

RedDragon_592 — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 14:01:23 GMT

A guy stuck his head into a barber shop and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said,
"About 2 hours."
The guy left.
A few days later the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, "How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around at the shop and said, "About 3 hours."
The guy left.
A week later the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, How long before I can get a haircut?" The barber looked around the shop and said, "About an hour and half."
The guy left.
The barber turned to a friend and said, "Hey, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn't ever come back."
A little while later, Bill returned to the shop, laughing hysterically. The barber asked, "So where does that guy go when he leaves?"
Bill looked up, tears in his eyes and said,
"Your house."

Comment on Joke of the day.

JAZZ_DA_SPAZZ — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 16:11:58 GMT

AN ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION.

'Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
I have been with a loose girl'.

The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano ?'

'Yes, Father, it is.'

'And who was the girl you were with?'

'I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation'.

"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later
so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?'

'I cannot say.'

'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'

'I'll never tell.'

'Was it Nina Capelli?'

'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.'

'Was it Cathy Piriano?'

'My lips are sealed.'

'Was it Rosa DiAngelo, then?'

'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.'

The priest sighs in frustration.
'You're very tight lipped, and I admire that.
But you've sinned and have to atone.
You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months.
Now you go and behave yourself.'

Joey walks back to his pew,
and his friend Franco slides over and whispers,
'What'd you get?'

'Four months vacation and five good leads.'

Comment on Joke of the day.

The Ccbw — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 16:06:14 GMT

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs And make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!'

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes And you're barefoot..

'OLD' IS WHEN...
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

'OLD' IS WHEN....
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police .

'OLD' IS WHEN..
'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take any fiber today.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot.

'OLD' IS WHEN...
An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

AND

'OLD' IS WHEN...
You are not sure if these are facts or jokes?